30 days of {truth} (2)

Day 5: Something you hope to do in your life.

There are many things, so I will just go with the first that popped in my mind when I read this question. You might be tired of hearing me talk about Eisley, but right now she’s always on my mind/heart and this is my reality… I just hope you understand and bear with me.

I hope to be a “voice for my daughter and to use what I have walked through to bring others to Him” (‘I Will Carry You’ by Angie Smith). Honestly, I’ve been really down and out lately. I know that I can still be her voice, even in this state that I’m in, but what I desire is to carry on her voice and her legacy and to be inspired to live life to the fullest. I hope to be inspired every day by how much she touched my life.

When I found out I was pregnant with Eisley, I was so inspired to do all of these things I had been hoping to learn. Her little life inspired me from early on. I signed up for an online sewing class, I began a new art journal, I made a list of goals that I wanted to accomplish by the time I am 25 (25 by 25 list), I had begun learning to cook healthy meals, etc.( When I was pregnant with Chase there were specific things that inspired me as well, but they were a different set of inspirations then that with Eisley.)

Carrying a life inside  inspired me to really live to the fullest and I guess what I am trying to say is that how Eisley inspired me, even before I felt her within me, when I was pregnant with her… I want to continue in that. I want to be inspired by her life even though she isn’t in my arms. She has changed my life forever and I hope to carry on her legacy, to be her voice and to be inspired every day by how much she touched my life.

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Day 6: Something you hope you never have to do.

Lose another precious child.

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Day 7: Someone who has made your life worth living for.

From the beginning, my mom has truly taught me so much about life and how to keep pressing on “despite”. My mom was 6 months pregnant with me when she lost my dad. She’s walked through SO much in her life and she has taught me so much in my 23 years. Where so many people would have given up, she pressed on. Now as I’ve walked through losing my daughter, she has been beside me throughout everything, encouraging me and helping me rememeber that life is still worth living for.  My mom has “made my life worth living for” by teaching and showing me that no matter what might happen, life IS still worth living and pressing into.

There are manypeople that God keeps placing people in my life and each of them inspire me in different ways. So many loved ones… and I know the list will grow as I grow older. :)

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You can read more about this 30 days of truth challenge and what it’s all about here. I actually won’t be doing days 8-10 for personal reasons but I will be posting days 11+ sometime later this week :)