Chase Journey · Life

Birth Story (Part 1): The Biggest Decision.

(If you haven’t already, you can read the birth story prequel here first.)

I had this “feeling” that I was having a girl, and that I would have “her” early and the labor would only be 6 hours long…

So imagine my surprise when all of my “feelings” turned out to be waaaay off! I was due July 9th and was incredibly surprised when I passed this date, not by 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, or 8 days but 9!! Nine exhausting, emotional days where each hour felt like an eternity. If you’ve been there then you totally know that this is not an exaggeration. If you haven’t been there, then I hope you never have to experience what I am talking about!

(I now know when I talk to first time moms to gently let them know, they might need to prepare themselves mentally, for being overdue or if their birth plan is altered! I would have appreciated more of that!)

I met with our Doctor almost every day after that. Each appointment he told me the same thing; my cervix was high and posterior and I wasn’t dilated at all. He gave me natural induction ideas and exercises, but none of which worked for me. Each time we walked away with our baby still inside, gaining ounces daily. Our arms ACHED to hold him/her.

(my last official prego pic before Chase arrived)

On Thursday July 16th we had another appointment, by this time 7 days overdue. For how huge Baby and I were, I felt surprisingly good, just emotionally worn out and ready to meet our baby.

At 8:30 am Dr. Hill checked my cervix, which was still closed, posterior, high and baby was head down but still high. I was so disappointed to hear that again. This time Dr. Hill sat us down in his office and laid out our options;
1. We could “wait out the weekend” and see if I went into labor on my own, baby and cervix cooperated and I deliver. I asked him, “What are my chances of going into labor on my own this weekend.” He didn’t think I would and even if I did, he thought it would end in a c section.
2. He then told us what he recommended; a scheduled C-section for Monday July 20th.
3. But he knew our birth plan and knew we wanted to try to deliver naturally, (vaginal) so he gave me the final option; being induced right away.
I felt so torn, nervous, afraid, even terrified that we might make the wrong decision. The questions flooded my mind; Why couldn’t I have just gone into labor on my own? Why did this have to be so complicated and difficult? I looked over at Ted. I already knew what he wanted to do. We were both so weary of coming in appointment after appointment and hearing nothing new and that it would be an even longer wait until we met him/her.
One encouraging factor was I did not have to make this decision alone. Ted was very much apart of every single step along the way. He was phenomenal. And this was the biggest decision we had ever run into as a couple, I mean, it had to do with another human being! We were an array of emotions that morning, more than I could describe to you with my words.
The final decision; I wanted a chance. I knew that I needed to at least try to deliver him/her naturally and I knew that this was my chance. I knew if I didn’t I would always wonder if I could have given birth naturally. This might not make sense, but it’s what I needed to do. Even having had an abnormally long labor, I still do not regret this decision. {Not one bit}

I told Dr. Hill that I wanted to be induced if this was my chance to try. He immediately picked up the phone, called the hospital and then told me to head over. The short drive to the hospital and the walk to the birth center was incredibly emotional. We were thrilled but I was mostly so afraid of the unknown. Even with all of the preparation we’d had, nothing could have prepared us for what we were about to walk through. Nothing could have prepared us for how emotionally rocked we would be during the next 42 hours and 12 minutes… (and for me, regarding this birth story, months after).
We both felt strongly of giving our son the name Chase Journey so to us it was not at all ironic or coincidental that his birth was in fact, a journey.

Stay tuned for part 2, coming soon…
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3 thoughts on “Birth Story (Part 1): The Biggest Decision.

  1. i am really loving reading this from your perspective! especially since I know a lot of the emotions you faced. love you friend and i can’t wait to read the rest.

    Like

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