We had another appointment this morning and our baby is still backed out of my pelvis but is head down, just not engaged. My cervix has been posterior and still is, which basically means it’s really high. With the baby’s help, it needs to be pushed farther down before we can begin labor.
Our doctor told us today, that if we were to go into labor right now, we would most likely need a cesarean. He told us we need to wait this weekend out and hope that the baby moves back down and begins his/her descent to help everything get ready, eh down there.
I have two options if I have a cesarean, both of which I do not like! One is general anethesia, which would put me under and I wouldn’t be awake to witness our baby’s birth and the moment where they say “its a…”. That would be such a hard thing. The 2nd option is an epidural which I really do not want, but I would be able to be awake for the delivery, just unable to hold our baby until everything was finished.
My reason for not wanting an epidural in the first place does not apply during this c-section. Our baby wouldn’t be affected by the epidural in anyway, because the procedure is speedy for delivering him/her. Just mommy would be affected and that is okay with me.
Please pray with us that our baby moves down this weekend and everything begins naturally! It’s my heart’s desire to have an all natural labor and delivery and to have that precious moment when they place the baby on me.
We are hoping and praying for the best! Obviously our greatest desire is our baby’s safety and we will do whatever it takes for that. Please join with us and pray!
*side note edit 4:31pm: I am having a really hard time and I’m actually really struggling with understanding why all of this is happening. I might write a blog tomorrow telling how I am honestly feeling, because right now due to tears, I’m afraid I wouldn’t make a whole lot of sense.